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1 : PURGATION
2 a : purification or purgation of the emotions (as pity and fear) primarily through art b : a purification or purgation that brings about spiritual renewal or release from tension
3 : elimination of a complex by bringing it to consciousness and affording it expression

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2000-10-31 - 21:23:23
So I am back from the grocery store. Rule number one, whenever you decide to go out of your way to be nice to other, i.e. buying candy for halloween. birthday gifts christmas gifts, what have you, always buy something you like. In this instance BabyRuth candy bars and butterfinger. Not only can you not go wrong with this selection, unless you have a bunch of dieting trick or treater,s all teh left overs stay with you. Granted that may not be a good thing, but certainly if would be better than buying all that no name candy, while good in its own right, but still....and ending up with an extra three bags of the stuff. Okay so maybe I went a little overboard buying 4 bags, but I was in a giving spirit. Getting ready for the real holiday of Christmas. yes that's right, I'm a giver. I can't help myself. I try not to be a giver, sometimes because I like to receive things to, but alas, my moral perpitude (what ever the hell that is) prevents me from not being a giver. Its a curse really.

Anyway i am prepared for Halloween, like a good neighbor....statefarm is there...wait that's not right. I hate sStatefarm. Okay hate is not the right word, I just loathe an individual who works for an insurance company and well since then all insurance companies are target for attack. Did I mention I was a giver....lol

Okay where to begin....ahhh like everyone says eventually. "at the beginning.

In the beginning God.....you notice that here I bring up God. He has a very big place in my life. Thank goodness. I'd be a terrible wreck otherwise. In the beginning God. D'you ever notice how that sentence starts. In the beginning God. From the very beginning God was present. Not in the beginning there was God. because that would infer that the beginning started before God. But in the beginning God created the heaven and the earth. period, end of story. the heaven and the earth. As far as I am concerned that is all of creation. How did God create the heaven and the earth. Well science might say that in the beginning there was a great big bang. I suppose there would have to be to create everything out of nothing. to me, science just helps us to know just how the God created.

.....but i am getting way ahead of myself, or way behind myself. I am fairly certain that in my beginning, there was no great bang. A lot of crying and screaming because I had to share the womb with a brother who would eventually turn out to be someone who would be thrilled to no end to finght in the next great war. I'm a pacifist by nature and he is not. I think we traded things while we were in there. I got my Dad's dark hari, he got my mom's red hair, (thank goodness) I got the bulk of the brain, he grabberd the bulk of the brawn. In exchange I took 5 inches of height from him. Only fair you know. Truthfully we were born, probably looking very much alike and have grown into day and night personified. My father was stationed at Germany at the time and my mother was already taking care of a 1 and a half year old red headed boy. i don't remember germany much as I was but a wee little infant when we returned to the States and had no prior life up to that point, at least no prior ,life that I have come to realize. no i don't believe in reincarnation either. At least it hasn't been proven to me to exist no matter what Shirley Maclaine may say otherwise.

The first few years of my life are a blur to me. Nothing much happened I guess. Nothing monumental. Just life of a toddler, preadolescent and then adolescent. We moved around alot since my father was still in the military. but we mostly lived in Texas. Ahhh texas, that grand ol' state. Lived here most of my life and have just recently yearned to live else where.

>All in all life was pretty mundane until the oh so common tragedy of divorce came to the family. I was 10, apparently mother and father were not happy and they felt it best they go there seperate ways. I am under the impression though that it was more my mother than my father. I think he still loves her in a way but he's been married a couple more times since there divorce. I guess mom was soured on the whole idea of marriage as she has remained single ever since.

Before their divorce though, there were events that are coming to mind. But this was just a humble beginning story wasn't it. Not the highlight tour.

speaking of highlight tour. Don't, no matter how exciting it may sound, take a highlight tour of England Ireland Scotland and Wales. Why the countries are beautfiul and wonderful and filled all sorts of interesting tidbits, that's all the tour will afford you. No, take your money, stay in bed and breakfast, take the train and do the tour your self. Soak it up. Delve into the places you go.

And that's all i'll say on that matter, until I describe to you in full all about said trip and the other trip I took to Europe, another highlights tour, but this one left me with fondfer memories

okay, I'm off for now. perhaps more later this evening. If the muse, and I mean me getting my lazy butt off the couch and not being disturbed by those two or three trick or treaters who will come a knockin' on my door and mosey on back in here and tell you more about me. that's if you are interested in reading such things.

neurosis ~ catharsis