Catharsis

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�QUOTE:

People think it must be fun to be a super genius, but they don't realize how hard it is to put up with all the idiots in the world. - Calvin

Catharsis:
1 : PURGATION
2 a : purification or purgation of the emotions (as pity and fear) primarily through art b : a purification or purgation that brings about spiritual renewal or release from tension
3 : elimination of a complex by bringing it to consciousness and affording it expression

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2001-06-10 - 9:53 a.m.

You should go there and look at all the Calvin & Hobbes comic strips. They have sniff other comics too, but Calvin&Hobbes, what more do you want

I guess I really don't have much of an update today. Work was pretty uneventful It was one of those all day affairs and with the exception of Derek until 5:45 work was a long boring drawn out situation that I could have done without. Too many people, a lot of them acting as though the world was to be served to them on the proverbial silver platter. And I'm sorry. I was using the silver platter at home thank you very much serving myself my dr pepper and chocolate. Really, I bought like umteen bags of candy at Walmart the other day, you know, to be the good host that I can be and I think I've eaten all the good stuff. But you know that really goes back to one of my first entries concerning halloween candy. I can't believe its been so long. I look back and am amazed that I have so many entries. Granted they aren't the most profound of entries but I really would have been burned out on this diary thing long before now, but this thing really has had some staying power.

Today looks to be one of those "oh my god I can't believe its already so hot but thank goodness I have a pool to swim in sort of days." The pool looks very enticing, the water all sparkly blue, glistening with the spring blue sky, so I will have to go swimming for a bit i'm sure. Bring a good book, a couple of Dr Peppers,what more could I possibly want? That was a rhetorical question by the way.

I'm curious, if your life was a movie, what kind of movie would it be. WOuld you find yourself in a comedy, with all the funny lines. Would it be a drama, a tragic tear jerker, one of those great historical epics (I always thought I was born in the wrong time), a chic flick a la "you've got mail" I like chick flicks, mostly because they cater to my romantic side. I have a large romantic side. It pains me sometimes to say that. But its true. Not that I don't enjoy other movies cuz a good adventure movie, a la Indian Jones or Star Wars, even the Mummy Returns was alright, nothing block buster worthy, but still it was watchable. I think I like Chick Flicks because almost to the end the guy gets teh girl or the girl gets teh guy and well I wish it was like that sometimes and if you look at reality, the world around us, we often times find ourselves not where we want to be, or with who we want to be with. And I guess this goes counter to one of my earlier entries or an entry that I contemplated, where I said, or was going to say that I was glad that I was not with anyone at the moment. Truth of the matter is I want to be with someone, with her, but I am not with her. I am with no one. It looks rather pathetic that I am in love with someone who can't possibly love me. No matter the feelings involved.

Rain fell like Seurat
with large white raindrops
and the sun, sparkled
on the Round Pond like windchimes
and dirty white swans coasted
on its silvered surface
as charcoal grey clouds
against an ivory sky
covered me like wet cotton
the red london buses
whispered by behind
a barrier of early spring trees in blossom
their trunks glistening obsidian
and everything was a wet melancholy

I miss London a great deal! I want to go back. I want to go there and stay. It was a beautiful city. i was a bit lonely there for a bit at the end of my visit, my friends and family all at home, but I would go back in a heartbeat. I miss it so.

I'm suddenly feeling a bit melancholy. I'm listening to my MP3s and they're not the usual songs that I listen to. Lately I have been listening to the likes of Green Day, Everclear, Creed, Matchbox 20,Deep Blue Something, Oleander, Stroke 9. That's a big difference from the country usic that I listen to in the morning as the alarm clock goes off, or the ballad music, i.e. Chicago, Journey etc that I usually listen to.

Right now Father of Mine by Everclear is playing. I haven't talked to my father in awhile. For the longest time I lived with my father after my parents were divorced. He provided for us, my brothers and I as well as he knew how to do, but (and this is from my perspective) we were his priority. he was his priority. We were secondary. And as a child of 10 through 16 it isn't something that you appreciate to know that you need fend for yourself. And I know I didn't have it bad, I mean we had a roof and clothes and a bed, but anyway.... going down that road looks to be a miserable expedition into insight that I don't want to think about. Divorce in all its glories can really screw up the kids. Thanks Mom and Dad.

Okay, I really got to go before I find myself blathering about nonsensical things. oooops too late.

read me later

neurosis ~ catharsis