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2001-06-11 - 11:49 a.m. I like to write. That is something. I like to see and show through words the world around me, the world that exists inside my head, the world that i see as ideal as opposed to the world that is real. Not that the two don't go hand in hand, quite to the contrary much of the time it does, much of the time my ideal and the real are one in the same. I seem to be at my most real in my poetry It is here that I see things the clearest, that I express things the clearest, that I feel things the clearest. It is hear that my emoitons are mostly real. Most of the stories that i have written seem to express things inside of me that I don't express verbally. I read them and see that i have a grudge against my parents, why else would almost all of the stories contain either dead parents or dying. Okay maybe grudge is not the right word. Maybe its a sense of abandonment. Maybe its the whole my parents weren't there as I was growing up scenario and so in my stories they aren't. Most of my writing is filled with love of one form or another. Not necessarily that romantic love, but love in general, love of family, love of friends, and yes that romantic love. Love is the most wondrous of things. If there was more of it in the world, instead of all the other baser desires and needs, this would be abetter place to live. But that is neither here nor there. I want to think I am different from everyone else. But thr truth is that I am just like everyone else. That I am yes different, but no more than everyone is different for everyone else. I am unique in the sense that i live my life while you live yours. I get to be profound to me and mayhaps a few others, but overall I am no more profound than anyone else. We, all of us, have the capacity to think and to be, to live and to love, to forgive and to forget, to try or to give up. Yesterday was an uneventful day. I went swimming for a bit, I ate a large deluxe pizza from Domino's, drank several Dr Peppers, read a littel over half of the new John Sandford book, Chosen Prey. Later WPaige and Wade and Christan came over, we went to bennigans and ate a late dinner, well 10:00 which isn all actuality was fairly early, then we went to Blockbuster to get a movie. Ended up watching, Final Destination, which was okay. Nothing too great. Sat around and talked for a bit afterwards and then they went home about 3:30 ish or so. I went to bed only to wake up at 7:00 ish to the alarm clock. I tried to ignore it, tried to sleep longer and dozed on and off for a bit more until I had to get up. After a refreshing glass of ice tea, well without the ice as it was already in the fridge, I went for a 20 minute swim. It was refreshing too. Then I sat down at the computer added a couple of poems to my poetry page, which you might have read over the last month since they were posted here on diaryland too and then have contemplated updating my science fiction fantasy page. Its been a while since I worked on it. Its not the best page I have ever visited, my html isn't top notch and most of it is created by netscape navigator 4.6, but i've been wanting to update it and add links to amazon, now that mazon, and borders.com since borders.com bookstore webite is soon to be merging with amazon, or rather amazon is taking over the website side of borders. SO I can link to amazon product and not have to deal with interest issues. the old site is here tell me what you think of it, if you visit and any hints or advice would be more than welcome. okay I got to go get ready for work. its thefun shift. I hate this shift. but sometimes you gots to do what you don't want to do. right. Read me later |
