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something's missing
Monday, Jan. 21, 2002 - 11:10 A.M. Went and saw Black Hawk Down last night. I admit at the outset I was more willing to sleep those couple of hours than sit next to smokey smokerson (Brian from Wade's work, smelled like he had wallered around in an ashtray, it was not good. I was all the way over as far as I could get into the next seat as I could.) The movie was good, but it felt like a documentary. Very blood and guts type of a film and the fact that it really happened, took some of the enjoyment out of the film, enjoyment in the sense that it was wonderfully performed. But let me leave no doubt, its a war film. But it was good. Course I went to the movie, half asleep (I had imbibed a couple of drinks before hand. 2 shots of grand marnier, a shot of apple pucker, and a mikes hard lemonade.) I was good to go. Wade, Paige, Jennifer (the talker), Christan, and Bryan went to the movie. Derek and Adam were supposed to go but we went to the last showing and Adam had to work early, or at least that was teh reason they Derek gave for not going. We Paige Wade and I were looking forward to his accompanying us. Wade saw Chris and Michael in the mall yesterday. I don't know why I put Chris first and not michael since michael was an integral part of the group, once upon a time, but I think its because Wade didn't even react to Michael until he saw that it was Chris. Apparently they noticed each other, and a cordial acknowledgement was made but that was pretty much it. Wade ended up in my store, asking "did you see them" and I'm thinking okay who's in the mall now and not stopping by to say hi to me this time? But I didn't see them, though I kept an eye out for them cuz even though Wade doesn't like them, even though they bailed on my birthday party, even though I call Wade my friend and they don't, I still like the boys. I don't like how things went down with everyone. The friendships that they had with each other carried way too much emotional and terriotorial baggage. None of them truly liked each other ,and if they did, if I actually missed something and their was a genuine friendship in there, then they had teh worst way of showing it. It's unfortunate, that one person who has discovered a genuine affection for another, is sudden spurned and treated like they aren't good enough. But I don't want to get into that. Its all in the past. Today is what we have to live. And looking back and reliving, drudging it all back up is not worth our time and effort and emotional well being. I finally watched all of Moulin Rouge. I think I fell asleep during part of it but that's only cuz I was covered up in my comforter, but I had watched most of it at work one day when Derek brought it to watch on his computer. I liked it better the second time. The ending is truly sad, phenomenally so. Not so that I was about to become misty eyed or anything, but Paige admitted that there was something in her eye after the end. Poor emotional girl. :) DId I tell you we all went to play Laser tag the other night. We went out to main event in grapevine. It was pretty cool. Not great mind you but cool. The lasers were cool anyway. I didn't exactly win, but I didn't wexactly lose. I think, if memory serves, and I believe it does, Derek had the lowest score. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA Course he wasn't going for highest score but rather he was approaching it with the golf score approach. Actually he was just shooting people. I think its his country upbringing. After laser tag everyone came over to eat pizza and watch a movie. THat's when we watched moulin rouge, which won a golden globe as did Nicole Kidman. I knew there was something on tv that I wanted to watch. damn it to hell! What else is there. I have to read Tartuffe by moliere tonight after work. We have a quiz on it tomorrow. Blech. Tartuffe quiz tomorrow. That's just not right at all. But that's what school is for, right? Mental torture along with testing to show that you are doing miserably at it. I say this and I know you see right through me, because I have an affinity for school. As some might say I've been going to school since they were 3, three! SOmetimes I hate him. Do you ever wonder why people have become your friends. Why they are suddenly in the friendzone, how you have been raised up out of the mire that is the entire population that surrounds you and you have been accepted as a friend. What qualities and circumstances have made you different than everybody else. I would like to think that I am everybody's friend. That I get along with everyone. That doesn't mean I like everyone. But sometimes I get to the pointthat I do.l Like the talker. When I first encountered her, I had this overwhelming desire to rip my eardrums out of my head and fling them at her. Now well she's an alright individual. When she hasn't partaken of any alcoholic beverages and isn't trying out for any welterweight divisions. But I get along with everyone. I'm for the most part peaceful. I don't do the whole in your face here I am thing. Not that this is bad, quite to the contrary it can be a good thing, You get noticed, people see you first and opportunity abounds. I don't know where this observation is leading. I did when I started it, but I got distracted. Anyway. I should go and get ready for work.I'm sure I am missing something, but I'm not quite sure what it is. something......
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